Slowly Slipping Away from This World

i never gone through a break up that hurt this much

i am in love and he loves me :)

so it is exam time which has me stressen pretty much all my exs that i hate r tryen to make things right some say i need to forgive but i have to put what i know that they don’t first before i can consider that because to much has happened

i’v never had a boyfriend who made me so happy before, i feel like for once i actually matter to him and mean as much to him as he means to me, we have now been dating for a month and 2 weeks now and for the first time we hugged, we started holding hands last week and then today i just was thinking i want to hug him so much i’v been dating him for over 2 months i have every right to hug him. i decided to ask one of my boyfriends best friends if he had ever said anything about liking me to him, he told me that bout a month before we started dating when they were all hanging out one morning before school he randomly told them that he had liked me for a while, by this time he had liked me for about a year, i was thinking about it randomly and realized that the moment i knew i liked him was when we were playing a game of ultimate frisbee and he, my ex, and i crashed in midair and my ex whom i was dating at the time landed on me and i found myself wishing it was him instead of the dude i was dateing at the time. i love my boyfriend, based on a a psychological study a crush will only last a maximum of 4 months if it exceeds your already in love, i crushed on him for a year before we dated and there is no question to it i love him

so as of next monday my boyfriend and i will have been dateing for a month now, we haven’t gone on a date he hasn’t met my mom and we haven’t even held hands…he does seem to be becoming more protective and right there though for once in my life i feel like things are going right…other than the fact that i’m failing geometry

i now own taylor swifts newest cd and it is amazing i am dateing my exbfs bestfriend i hate my ex it is hard to be semi nice to him but i do for my bf but i don’t know really where this is even going anymore i mean it seems like he likes me but i don’t know we haven’t held hands, hugged, kissed none of that and it is starting to bug me i don’t want to end my relationship with him but i can’t go through this kind of relationship again i’v been there before and i never want to go back if you got any advice please let me know for once i think i need advice instead of giving it

so my bday is tuesday supper excited i’m a blond will soon have a bf… i think Nikko and i are gone long story there but we all live learn love and have a broken heart but move on

Nikko went on vacation for like 5 days and we don’t getta talk at all during that time it is day 4 and i miss him so much i love him so much and i can’t even date him i am so scared that he is going to break my heart but it is better to have loved than to have lost than to have never loved at all, 15 more days till the 4 months since i last cut i am finally clean

i was checken my email when i saw something from the TWLOHA web page and i realized on August 17th it will have been 4 months since i last cut myself, i found my faith in God when i went to camp, and i am probably going to start dateing a guy i’v liked since i met him, life has troubles but looking at these higlights reminds me why i stay

wow dumping someone after a week of dateing fine whatever but dumping them on facebook is even lower than if its in a text they need to grow-up man up and one day maybe even grow a pair